Being a victim brings on a painful feeling of shame. Something happened to you at the hands of somebody else, and you were defeated in that moment. It is a hard pill to swallow. Nobody wants to lack control over their life. Bullying can happen at any age and take place anywhere. If you have been a victim of being mistreated, bullied, or emotionally abused, it is important to know that you must not wallow in self pity. The reason why, is because you are allowing yourself to feel inferior to the person you fell victim to. Life is full of its ups and downs, but there are many opportunities to pull yourself back up.
When you are emotionally abused, it can be hard to find support. Sometimes nobody is there to offer you light upon the emotional abuse and you may start to accept failure. For example: assume somebody told you all your life that you will never amount to anything, and no one told you the opposite. This is where your inner work comes in. If no one else is telling you how worthy you are, tell yourself. Just because nobody is telling you that you are worthy, it doesn't mean you aren't. Many people find this difficult because it isn't enough to tell yourself something positive. It seems like you need someone else telling you that. But this step is really about not trying to prove anything to anyone but yourself. And with this step, telling yourself that you are beautiful, worthy, and important, is like tricking that nasty negative mind that constantly tells you the opposite. When negative thoughts come into your mind, it is best to counter those thoughts with positivity. That is the only way you can beat negativity. Even if you were bullied and teased by other people, it doesn't help to beat yourself up when other people are already doing that. It is like beating yourself up after you have lost a fight. Where does that get you? No where. You end up even more hurt. But if you lose the fight, and get in the gym, practice, and work on your defense skills, you will be better off.
Acceptance of the Past
Know exactly who's issue it was in the first place. When you are a victim of bullying, it is not your fault. However, being a victim can make you feel like a villain. You may start to analyze if there was something that you did wrong and may even start to blame yourself. But no. Accept that you were mistreated for no reason. The Issue was that person's not yours. And you got something that you did not deserve. When you accept what happened to you the easier it is to come to terms with it.
Sometimes People Catch you at a Weak Moment
During my time of tae kwan do, I of course learned to never let my guard down. If somebody aimed for my face, my arm was always there to block their foot. However, there were times I was distracted, or so into my different stances that I let my guard down, and BAM! I got kicked in the face. It didn't feel good, but my offender caught me off guard. This happens with bullies as well. Sometimes they catch you off guard and when they get you, it feels horrible. However, a bully is telling more about how they fight when they do this. They try to get their shots in whenever they can. But just know that, you need to protect yourself at all times. If somebody comes for you, be ready for them. If they are saying something to you, have a response. Declare your stance that you will not be disrespected and do not ever let them get away with attacking you.
Everybody has the right to be happy no matter what. Bullies are miserable people who want to pass their misery on to other people. Don't take it. Leave their misery right with them. Let them know, you do not consume my life nor are you capable of having any affect on it. Do this by simply just being happy. Isn't that amazing? Think about it, you have the right to be happy regardless of how other people feel, and their is nothing they can do about it. Trust me, it will crush them.
Monet – “My name is Monet. It is said the same way as singer Janelle (Monae)! Friends and family call me Naisy (neigh•zee). Writing has always been my passion. My other hobbies are playing piano, cooking, working out (Pilates and tae Kwan do), reading and beauty/skin care”