June 26, 2020

I’m not so proud as to say that I’ve never been made uncomfortable by someone else’s good fortune. That is to say that yeah, I’ve been envious before. Sure, it might be rare, but anyone who says they haven’t is a liar. There’s a lot of shame surrounding the act of admitting that you harbor irrational or childish emotions, but I think that shame stems from how poorly we’ve been trained to handle our emotions.

There are very few...

June 17, 2020

When I was a bright eyed African American Studies minor in undergrad, I read the autobiography of Eldridge Cleaver, the renown Black Panther Party leader. Cleaver detailed his accounts of raping black women as practice before building the confidence to venture into white neighborhoods to then rape white women.

As a black woman, it wasn’t Cleaver’s demented narrative that resonated with me or the fact that he was nonetheless he...

June 9, 2020

After days of protesting and rioting across the country, social unrest lingers and emotions remain high from the murder of George Floyd. Two weeks ago, people of various race and creed, and corporations nationwide, joined in solidarity urging for racial equality.

For many black people, this gives us a feeling of hope, in a reoccurring state of despair. Passionate claims of a black love and revolution are flooding the blac...

April 15, 2020

I started dating women two years ago. I was always attracted to masculine presenting women a.k.a “studs” but never explored the attraction until my last year of law school. There was this young woman, her name was Chloee. She was light skinned, laid back, witty, and generous. Not to mention, she was fine. I’m talking, “turn-a-straight-girl-gay” Young M.A. fine. I’ll fast forward things a bit because this isn’t about me, rather...

March 13, 2020

Recently in Blackistani news, The Baby punches a fan, two separate black women get jumped by two separate groups of black males in close proximity to each other, and a little black girl exposes what the “community” really does to the psyche of dark skinned black girls and women. This is all connected.  

Your sons and your community are devouring your daughters and these incidents are why I refuse to bring a beautiful black...

March 6, 2020

In recent media and news, we are seeing the continued impact of colorism, level up, and black women empowerment conversations on the image of black women and girls, specifically dark skinned black women and girls.

On the reality entertainment front, we see a positive representation of a dark skinned woman being loved on and cared for by a provider man. On the big screen, we finally see a healthy black relationship with NORMAL...

February 28, 2020

This is going to be a little bit of a tough love session for black women (myself included) and If that is not what you want to read, I understand. However, I said what I said and while I love black women, there are some things that we need to answer for. 

In recent years, specifically since the 2010’s, the image of black women and specifically phenotypic, dark-skinned black women is undergoing a subtle yet drastic change. We ar...

February 21, 2020

Think about this scenario:

You are sitting at a bar in a nice restaurant, on a very nice side of town. You are enjoying a delicious fruity cocktail while looking good, feeling good, and enjoying the slow, smooth music. Just as you daintily raise a finger, beckoning the bartender, a non-black man approaches you.

He makes eye contact, asks how you are doing, and kindly introduces himself. He then offers to buy you a drink. The co...

February 14, 2020

On my personal level up journey I decided early on that I would join a few Facebook groups centered around women who are doing the same, in hopes of finding and learning from like-minded women. As of late, I am less active in the groups due to the negativity, off topic, regressive discussion, and caping.

However, it is also due to the disappointing amount of dark skinned women who feel like they only deserve the bare minimum....

February 7, 2020

I know last time I said that would be the first and last installment of this series; but the nigatry that’s afoot this week brought it back from the graveyard. The topic this week? Y’all really and I mean really need to stay out of black women’s business and black women, especially dark-skinned black women, need to stop making themselves look dumb for black men's approval.

These stories are really starting to grate on my nerves...

February 6, 2020

On a trip back to Los Angeles I walked into a tea shop and caught up with an old-ish acquaintance of mine. I first met her years ago on a trip to France. She made sure I got home safe after deciding to walk home alone from a bar with young, naïve, drunken, adamancy.

I hadn’t spoken to her since leaving France, but I saw her post about going to Los Angeles the same week that I would be there and thought “quelle chance”. I hit h...

January 31, 2020

Terry Crews is exactly why I, and many other dark skinned black women no longer choose to defend the collective of black men. Let’s take a trip down memory lane, shall we? 

In 2018, or maybe 2017 Terry Crews came out and spoke about being sexually assaulted by a man in a man in a bathroom during a party. I remember during this time, Tumblr was still a big part of my life and as those who are familiar with it know, it’s one of t...

January 24, 2020

In recent years, the trend of “The relatable” social media influencer has popped up and effectively blown up; Changing all social platforms and the ways influencers relate to the public audience. The relatable influencer is someone who gains popularity through her seemingly awkward, or “normal” personality.

This trend, up until about a year or so ago was dominated by white girls. Second to that, mixed girls and light skinned g...

January 20, 2020

Greetings fellow dark skinned black women...We need to get on code and even more importantly...STAY ON CODE. 

I am sure you have heard the word “code” thrown around the black woman blogs and vlogishpere but what is it? Simply put, a code in this sense is just an unspoken set of rules and conduct specific to whatever group you are a part of.

It appears that every race, gender, social, and peer grouping has a code...except dark-s...

January 10, 2020

This will probably be the first and last installment of of this “series” but this week in the media brought on a particular onslaught of chatter on the subject of dark-skinned women. More specifically, what(who) we’ve been doing and what we’ve been saying; Particularly our criticisms of the community. Loni Love’s rightful criticism of the black male collective, Gabourey Sidibe and her new white man, and Ari Lennox being called...

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